Well hello everyone, it's been over a month since my last post. I have been one busy bee at work since my coworker went out for surgery. But today is the first day in a while that I could sit down a reflect on all the wonderful people I have met in the past month. I've been keeping notes on weird people just so that I could come back later to explain here in my blog. I even have a new story for My Life as a Redneck Neighbor Blog, God I hate my neighbors!!! But enough about that, the little tale I'm going to tell you about actually happened yesterday. I had arrived at the house I had a trouble ticket on. A little old lady, maybe in her late 60's greets me at the door. Telling me that lightning had gotten her phone and her satellite. So I go to our box to check it out, and indeed lightning had tore the box up. I replaced all the guts inside and still didn't have any dial tone. I measure it to find that it had broke at the pole also. After I fix that I call her house with no answer. I go into the house check the phone and still nothing, but it was working at our box. Well with my above the average person intelligence level, I figured out something might be wrong between our box and this jack. Real genius I am...lol. So I come back inside to get a better look at the jack. Her couch was in the way and I told her I needed to move it out. She told me "It's heavy, that's why I don't clean behind there." Looking at the rest of her house, at this point that is, and say to myself SURE, that's the reason. So I slid it out to see that lightning had also gotten it. "Ok can I see your basement please", since the wire was coming from downstairs. She gets this look on her face like did he really just ask me that. Then goes into explaining to me that her brother is on vacation down in Florida and he hasn't been by to take out her trash. ??? Then she opens the basement door. Holy shit, look at all that trash! Must have been the look on my face, cause she automatically apologizes. I get downstairs to find pathways through bags of trash, and I mean TRASH. How long has this brother been on vacation, since February?! But not only trash because all we've seem to have for the last month is rain, we now have soaked trash. So I start doing some investigation to find she has a collection of spiders working overtime on web making. Of course my face was what removed most of them. As I'm spitting webs out of my mouth I keep hearing "sorry!" from the little old lady. She had mentioned something about it's just a basement, that's what you do with them. And ask me if I had a basement, I said I did. She then said is yours like this, and I replied, "No, we use ours as a room, to which she said "Oh, sorry." Ok so after numerous trip back and forth to the van I finally get it fixed, which lightning had hit that wire in 2 more places in the basement. Lightning doesn't always play nice. Go back upstairs now to meet the sister who also lives there. She made me feel like a a free sample of candy dangling in front of a Wal Mart electric cart riding diabetic. She just made me feel uncomfortable, especially since I had to bend over to replace the jack. So of course I hid my ass crack before I go towards the floor, I think I heard a damn come from underneath her breath. I am a catch, just sad that it's to old ass women...lol. Well I get everything done and push the couch back to it's original position and go to my vehicle. The first old lady comes out about 45 seconds later and said,"Sir you forgot to put the box back on the wall." Now she told me she isn't able to clean back there but she's able to go back there to inspect my work?! I grabbed some double sided tape and attached the jack to the wall, even though the dust balls back there were bigger than her head. I find that people are weird about things in their life, she cares not about huge dust bunnies behind her couch or the fact that she has a small garbage dump in her basement, but God forbid that jack isn't attached to the wall...
I'm going home to get into the pool,
Marc
